Square Eyes: Kids' TV of the 80s/90s

I have an unhealthy obsession with all things nostalgic (though I draw a line at mullets and jackets rolled up at the sleeves.) This, combined with a fondness for the TV of my childhood has driven me to create the Square Eyes blog. Simply an A-Z of the shows I watched, with my inimitable commentaries...

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Fun House


FUN HOUSE
Made by: Scottish Television
Shown on: ITV
Years shown: 1990-99 (really?!)
Theme tune: "Wacky! Wild! Crazy! It's outrageous!/Fun House, it's a whole lot of fun, prizes to be won/It's a real crazy show where anything can go/Fun House, it's a quiz, it's a race, a real wacky place/Use your body and your brain if you wanna play the game/Fun House!"

Fun House was a children’s game show which endured and outstayed its welcome almost as long as its presenter’s mullet (the photo above is obviously of the post-mullet era.) The man with the haircut of the gods was radio DJ, Pat Sharp, who hosted the show with a pair of identical twin cheerleaders, Melanie and Martina, who frankly must have been about thirty by the time the programme ended.

There were two teams of two school children, the reds and the yellows, who were encouraged to enthusiastically cheer themselves at all opportunities, even when they’d got all their questions wrong or were just being declared the losing team. The kids were asked general knowledge questions, and had to slam their buzzer to answer; there were also challenges which usually involved gunge and/or water and lots of ‘mayhem’, where Sharp would try to keep his fine tresses away from it all.

Everyone’s favourite round was the one with the motorised go-karts, where two opposing team members would race around the track in the studio, trying to grab as many of their coloured tags as they could, which were positioned trackside, before swapping with their team-mate, who would hopefully go round and nab the rest. This was much slower than it should have been. At the end of this round, Melanie and Martina would count up the tags and Pat would declare the final score. And then came the part that every child in the UK wished they could get the chance to take part in - the Fun House itself, where the winning duo were allowed to compete for the big prizes.

The prizes were fantastic on Fun House, and they were read out to the kids before they started, and the location of the tag which represented them was pointed out in the giant maze of a jungle-gym, so they could make a bee-line for the ones they wanted. The bounty ranged from skateboards and telescopes, to juggling sets and jigsaw puzzles; there was often something like a flying lesson thrown in there, and then there was the Power Prize - usually an exotic foreign holiday. The kids worked in a relay and, with a time-limit, would dash around the Fun House collecting prize tags, running through rotating car-wash brushes, and sliding down inflatable chutes until the final siren blared. God, I wish I’d been on that show! In fact, some people at my high school had been on it in their younger days, and had won; but the boy turned down the Power Prize trip to Egypt, and got a cash prize instead, which is not at all in the spirit of the game.

SQUARE EYES RATING: 7/10

(Thanks to www.ukgameshows.com for the borrowed pic)



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